April 16th 2011
It is the morning before another event, and I feel you are due for another crumb from my illustrious table of greatness. Remember, my opinions are better than yours. That's why you're having someone read my column to you (because you probably can't read) and not the other way around.
So where do I start? Well, let's start at the top with our grand champion. Since becoming chamption, he's amounted to two things: 1) Nothing, and 2) Getting completely destroyed in his first and only match since becoming champion. Is this seriously the best of the bunch? He hasn't even tweeted recently. Then again, that's understandable. If the only thing I accomplished since becoming champion was getting humiliated, I wouldn't have much to tweet about either.
And speaking of humiliated, how about Storm Harrison and Ash? They're team name should've been Hairy Ash, because that's what they're performance reminded me of. Seriously, how can you beat the crap out of one guy for the entire match, and then his partner tags in, you take a few punches, and lose? You would really, really have to suck to lose in that fashion. Wait...I think I just answered my own question.
I want to also call out the absurdity of Ingoyama. What's this guy's deal? I don't even know how this guy makes it to the wrestling events when he's struggling to master fire and the wheel. Sorry, this is wrestling, not Man vs. Wild.
And finally, this wouldn't be a Flawless Facts if I didn't rip on the Bloods. I _would_ say that Mark is dragging his family's name down into the mud, but Mike already did that years ago. Once Johnny Young hands Mark another guaranteed defeat, he should retire a loser just like his dad -- and no, that meaningless Tag Team belt that Mike won in his last match before retirement doesn't qualify Mike as a winner.
I'm Flawless Fred, and those are the Facts!
