Return With a Vengeance

[The lights go off in the arena.  Eerie music plays over the sound system.  The Sons of Darkness, led by Nick Belhor, walk menacingly down to the ring.]

Jim “The Amp” Johnson:  Oh boy. These guys.

WarHead:  They nail it with the “scary” factor.

[The Sons of Darkness climb in and Nick takes a mic.  The lights stay dark, but a single red overhead spotlight illuminates the three men in the ring]

Nick Belhor:  The time of safety is over.  The Sons of Darkness have returned.  Prepare for the time of suffering to begin!  I fully plan to unleash Mastema and Abbadon onto the NRWL without mercy!  The agonizing screams of pain will drown out the wailing cries of all you people as you watch your heroes be annihilated one by one.  And we will start by laying waste to the tag team champions, Bruno Kowalski and Marty Anderson!  Bruno and Marty, savor your last few days, because when the Sons of Darkness come for you, you will--

[Suddenly the JumboTron turns on with a static buzz.  After a few seconds of white noise, it clears to show an old phonograph on a beat-up wooden stand in a decrepit room.  It starts playing creepy pipe organ music.]

Jim:  What is--?  What’s going on?

WarHead:  Did someone plug thier game of Silent Hill into the JumboTron?

[A man then walks out from behind the curtain at the top of the ramp.  He’s wearing a long black coat, a black fedora, and an old gas mask (circa World War II).  He stands at the top of the ramp and stares for several seconds at the Sons of Darkness in the ring.  The music dies down.]

Nick Belhor:  How dare you interrupt!  Do you know what you have now done to yourself?  Your demise will not be quick, and your pleas to end the pain that will be inflicted on you will not be acknowledged!

Stranger:  Demise.  You know nothing of demise.  Suffering.  Screams.  Agony.  Pain.  Annihilation.  To know this things, you must live these things.

Jim:  Is that…?

WarHead:  I think so…

Stranger:  My name is Death Man.

[The crowd erupts at the mention of the name.]

Jim:  IT IS!!  The SCSF legend and Season 1 veteran Death Man!

WarHead:  I can’t believe it!
Death Man:  But this is not about me.  This is about you, and your two henchmen.  I have a declaration.  A match, if you will.  Nick Belhor, as you represent Abbadon and Mastema, I also represent two men.

[Creepy music plays and a large masked man walks out and stands behind Death Man.  The crowd cheers upon seeing him]

Jim:  Holy Moses!  It’s Apollyon!

WarHead:  Aligned with Death Man!  Wow!

[Nick scowls with anger.  Then, bursts of fire erupt from the top of the stage around Death Man and Apollyon, and another masked man walks out.  The crowd cheers loudly yet again when they recognize the man.]

Jim:  OH!  MY!  GOD!!!

WarHead:  It’s Fireburner!!!  No way!!!
[Fireburner walks and stands, arms folded, next to Apollyon, behind Death Man.  Nick stares with nervousness.]

Death Man:  Here is the declaration.  There will be a match.  Abbadon and Mastema versus Apollyon and Fireburner.  Tornado tag match.  No DQ.

[The crowd cheers with approval of the set match.]

Jim:  Oh wow!

WarHead:  That match is NOT going to be pretty.

Death Man:  If the Sons of Darkness win, I will leave, and you will get a handicap match: all of you against Apollyon.

[Nick Belhor grins evilly.]

Death Man:  But if Apollyon and Fireburner win, the Sons of Darkness leave the NRWL…

[Nick’s smile turns into an angry frown.]

Death Man:  And Apollyon gets 1-on-1 Extreme Rules with you, Nick Belhor.

[The crowd roars with cheers.]

Jim:  Ho….ly….

WarHead:  Crap!!!!

[Nick Belhor storms around the ring furious.  The five other men stare each other down.]

Jim:  This is incredible!

WarHead:  I can’t wait for this match!

Jim:  Who will survive?!  Tune in to find out!

[Scene fades.]

Revenge

[scene opens to Abbadon walking menacingly through the hallways back stage.  He has just left the ring area after attacking his tag partner, Mastema, from behind in the Tag Team Championship match.  He walks with purpose and any staff or crew in the hallway cower down or paste themselves to the wall, lest they feel his wrath.]

Jim “The Amp” Johnson:  I’m still in shock of what happened during that match.

WarHead:  Me too.  But where is he going?

[Abbadon reaches a set of wooden, windowless double-doors marked “Storage.”  He rips open the door]

JJ:  What the--?!?!?

[Sitting, hunched over, presumably unconscious, tied to chair with chains and rope, covered in bruises and welts, is…..Abbadon?]

WH:  Two of them!??!

[The standing, unbound Abbadon reaches of and rips the sack of his head, revealing another masked face]

WH:  NO WAY!!

JJ:  APOLLYON!!!  OH MY GOD!!!

[Apollyon wheels over a TV stand.  He turns on the TV and slaps Abbadon in the head.  Abbadon slowly lifts his head.  He looks up at Apollyon, still groggy.  Apollyon points over at the TV.  Abbadon turns to the TV to see it tuned into the live NRWL show.  The screen displays Tommy V. and Marcus celebrating in the ring with their newly won tag team championship belts.]

WH:  Well, you know what they say, revenge is a dish best ser—

[While Abbadon is still watching the goings-on on the TV, in quick, deft move, Apollyon delivers a massive boot to Abbadon’s head.  Abbadon and the chair spill backwards with a crash.]
 
JJ:  OH MAN!!!  A big boot to the side of the face!!

WH:  How can you tell it’s the side of his face?

[Abbadon lays motionless.  Apollyon picks up the TV and stands over Abbadon.  A commotion is heard from behind, and Apollyon turns with the reflexes of a cat, swinging the TV at the sound behind him, which happened to be Mastema!  Mastema falls to the ground, holding his head.  Apollyon kicks him solidly in the ribs, which makes Mastema instinctively curl up, gasping for air]

WH:  Oh, that never feels good.

JJ:  Apollyon is wreaking havoc!

[Apollyon looks up, and sees a few paces down the hall, Nick Belhor standing and staring in horror.  Nick comes to and takes off running.  Apollyon gives chase and quickly catches up and grabs Nick by the collar.  He spins Nick around and knees him in the gut, collapsing Nick.]

WH:  This does not look good for Nick.

JJ:  Apollyon is delivering some payback!

[Apollyon lifts Nick overhead, and gives him the Darkeness Falls through a pile of pallets!  Nick lays there motionless in a pile of broken and splintered wood.  Apollyon walks back down the hallway towards the exit.  As he approaches Mastema, who is on his hands and knees, he picks up metal hand truck, walks up to Mastema, and bashes it over Mastema’s back!  Mastema arches his back and contorts his body in pain.  Apollyon exits the arena.]

JJ:  The Sons of Darkness just got collectively destroyed Apollyon!

WH:  Maybe Nick kept the wrong one…

JJ:  Either way, the Sons of Darkness got a taste of their own medicine!

[scene fades out]

A New Fear

*The lights go out in the arena.  A few dimly lit red lights come on and sinister music plays as the Sons of Darkness emerge from behind the curtain at the top of the ramp.  Nick Belhor leads Abbadon and Apollyon slowly and methodically down to the ring.  All three climb in.  Nick takes a mic and stands at the center of the ring with his two bruisers over each shoulder.  The lights come back on.*

Nick:  Well, all you people should feel special.  Tonight is a very important night.  Possibly the most important night in your sad and meaningless lives.  It is also a very important night for the NRWL, and should maybe be looked at as a sort of warning.   You see, if you thought things were dangerous now, you are all in for an unpleasant shock.  Because tonight, I introduce the NRWL to a new Son of Darkness!

*the lights dim again, and chilling music begins creeping over the PA system.  From behind the curtain emerges a large man not unlike the build of Abbadon and Apollyon.  He wears black pants, black boots, and black muscle shirt.  Over his face is a black featureless mask.  He climbs into the ring determinedly and stands directly behind Nick, so that the 3 bruisers form a triangle behind him.  The lights wax back on.*

Nick:  The NRWL is now on notice.  This is Mastema - the newest member of the Sons of Darkness.  Rest assured, he is not here to make friend, but make destruction.  He is not here to slap backs, but break backs.  He has not come here to wrestle, but to injure.  He has not come here to wrestle, but to end careers.  No one is safe anymore.  And there is one already that we have in mind.  It's time to start clearing away the dead wood of the NRWL.  And it starts tonight!  Unfortunately, there can only be one master, and two disciples.

*As soon as Nick finishes his sentence, Mastema clubs Apollyon in the back of the head with a double-axe handle.  Apollyon falls to the ground and Mastema and Abbadon begin stomping him mercilessly.  Abbadon picks Apollyon up and delivers a crushing backbreaker over his shoulders.  Mastema exits the ring and grabs a steel chair and the timekeepers bell and climbs back into the ring.  He tosses the chair down while Abbadon holds an unconscious up in a full nelson, and Mastema runs towards him and bashes the bell off Apollyon's head with a sickening deep ring.  Apollyon crumbles to a heap on the mat while a pool of blood forms under his head.  Abbadon picks up the chair, opens it a bit, and places it the fold on top of and behind Apollyon's head.  He looks up to Nick, who nods.  Abbadon leaps straight up in the air and stomps the chair into Apollyon's face with all his weight.  Apollyon lays there motionless, chair bent around his head.*

Nick:  As I said and have just demonstrated, no one is safe.  Let the new fear spread.

*The Sons of Darkness exit the ring, leaving the broken Apollyon in the ring.  Medical staff rush out from the backroom, and fearfully walk around the Sons of Darkness on the ramp.  The tend to Apollyon as the scene fades.*

A Tape

*Bruno Kowalski and Max Destruction are in a back hallway.  The two are discussing technique as Max demonstrates to Bruno the motion of a new type of headlock he’s been perfecting.  Their session is interrupted by an arena intern*

Intern:  Excuse me, sirs.  But I found this outside leaning up against one of the doors to the arena.

*The intern hands Bruno a cruddy, brown manila envelope.  Written on the front of it in charcoal is “BRUNO AND MAX.”  Bruno opens up the envelope and pulls out a VHS tape.  Bruno and Max look at each other, puzzled.  They look for a VHS player.   After 10 minutes, they finally find one hooked up to an old CRT television.  It put in the VHS tape and press play.  After a few seconds of static, a video starts.  It’s Nick Belhor, standing in a front of shoddy table.  The walls are cracked with peeling paint.  Room is illuminated (barely) by a single florescent light, that buzzing constantly and flickers regularly.  Towering menacingly over Nick’s left and right shoulders, is Apollyon and Abbadon. *

Nick:  To the men who refer to themselves as “The Polish Powerhouse” and “Max Destruction,” this is a warning to you.  At the next event, you will find yourself confronted by the Sons of Darkness.  You foolishly and erroneously proclaim yourselves to be a powerhouse and destruction.  Look behind me and see that, the Sons of Darkness embody those terms, not you two termites.  This Sunday, you will be stepped on and you will then be forgotten.  Enjoy the last few moments of your wrestling careers, gentlemen.

*tape cuts off.  Bruno puts his hands on his hips and shakes his head in angry disagreement while Max folds his arms with a scowl on his face.  The two look at each other, shake forearms, and walk away in the direction of a training room.*

The Jay Transfer: Breaking Matches!

Jay Phillips: Jay Phillips here with the J-Transfer! We’re a few hours away from the next event, and here’s the latest card additions! Meinrad von Brakkus will be taking on Apollyon. Here’s what Meinrad had to say:

Meinrad: NRWL management talked to me earlier this week, and it wasn’t the good kind of talk. So, to get them to change their tune, I’m calling out Apollyon. I can chop down that redwood, and show the NRWL that I still belong here!

Jay Phillips: Nick Belhor had this to say:

Nick Belhor: First off, let me address that gnat, Michael Armstrong. You somehow think that because you were gifted a match, and was also able to defeat a failure, that you are now some sort of headliner now? The only headline you’ll be known for is the shortest career in the NRWL, when Abbadon ends yours! And going back to that failure I mentioned, Meinrad. You are a waste. While NRWL management show us time and time again they are completely incompetent, they are correct in having suspicions about you. But then again, if they had any REAL managerial insight, you would have been gone already. They are a joke, and so are you.

Jay Phillips: Sounds like more hangs in the balance of that match that just a win/loss record! Up next, Doomsday takes on Johnny Young!

Doomsday: I’m still not officially on the roster, but I’m almost there. And I think taking down Johnny Young—which I WILL do—will be the last hurdle I have to clear to earn my roster spot. Johnny, you seem to take some sort of pride in being a kind of backstage bad-ass. I guess being out in the ring is proving too tough for you. But that’s OK, I’ll play by your rules. Let’s rumble somewhere else in the building—your choice. Just let me know where to be, and I’ll show up and deal you a beatdown!

Jay Phillips: Johnny Young, never one to not have a retort, responded with this:

Johnny Young: Awww yeaahh! The Star Player totally gets where you’re coming from. You’re upset because clearly nobody ever showed you any attention in life. Whereas me, I can’t stop getting attention from everyone! Unfortunately for you though, you’ve got my attention. And if a Grade-A beatdown is what you’re asking for, I’ll be happy to provide it. See you in the ring! Don’t forget your glow sticks, freak! Yeeaaahhh!!!

Jay Phillips: Has relative new kid on the block Doomsday bitten off more than he can chew in Johnny Young, who excels in backstage brawls? This will be an exciting one to watch! Up next, Pedro Muchaco calls out Slugger Malone.

Pedro: *pedro is relaxing in his Jacuzzi (still still wearing his mask) with a hot little Latina at each arm* Ay! Sloogur Mah-lohwn! I saw chu get set on fire last show. Ha ha ha! Bet that deedn’t feel good, deed it hombre? I got somtheeng else hot for chu, man. And no, I don’t meen one of theese chicas. I meen me! Theenk chu can take the heet? I don’t theenk so! So get out of the keecheen!

Jay: Slugger, never backing down from a challenge, rebutted with this.

Slugger: Listen here, runt! You may be quick and always flying, but you know what else does that too? These! *holds up his dukes* Too bad for you though, these do more damage, too. I’m gonna make that mask of your be permanently imbedded into your face! Bring it!

Jay: Something is telling me for some strange reason that that match is going to be the sleeper match of the night. And finally, Marty Anderson reported to find this chunk of bark outside his dressing room door. He sent us this pic.

*piece of bark shows two stick figures. One with an orange beard, and one with blue shorts. The stick figure with the blue shorts has an X scratched into the bark over it.*

Jay: Marty, like the rest of us, take this as a challenge from Ingoyama. Marty had this to say:

Marty: This nutjob pulls out a lucky win over Slugger, and thinks he’s ready to take me on? If it was a *real* match, Slugger would’ve won easily. In fact, he already did that. Any chump can toss someone over ropes. But pining shoulders to the mat requires skill, quick thinking, and killer instinct. Ingoyama, you messed up bad challenging me. So I’m going to make you learn from your mistake the hard way! Whether you love me, or you hate me, I’ll make sure you respect me. And you will.

Jay Phillips: There you have it. Once again, it promises to be a heck of a show! Don’t miss it!

The J-Transfer - Late Interviews

March 30th 2011



Hey everyone! Welcome to another edition of the J-Transfer! I’m Jay Phillips! Well, the next show is just one day away, and I’m here to bring you some last minute updates, quotes, and even some buzzer-beating challenges! Let’s roll the clips!



*Pedro Muchacho is seen carrying his gym bag and in walking to his Rolls-Royce Phantom in an expensive suit and his luchador mask.*




Jay: Pedro! Your thoughts on that cosmic challenge from Quasar?




Pedro: Let me tell chu sometheeng, Hay! Que-sar had the luck of the Ireesh on hees side last time because eet was Saint Patty’s Day, and hees all green like a lepreekon! But thees time, will be deefrint! Don’t expek thees match to be as long, hombre. I will beet him queekly and weeth authoratee! No one will say hees performance was stellar! Ha ha ha! See what I deed there? Ha ha ha!



*clips cuts to a ring in an near empty gym where Bruno Kowalski is sparring with one of his trainers*




Jay: Bruno! Can you give me some insight on your Triple Threat match with Mark Blood and Slam Jackson?




Bruno: *in mid-application of a rear naked choke hold* It’s going to be a hell of a match. Slam Jackson, despite his flashy look and name, is pure talent. I might have to rely on a few double-teams in order to take him down. And as for Mark, it’s clear his father trained him well. He had some bad luck in the tournament, but I think anyone who writes him off is underestimating him. I won’t make that mistake.



*clip to Jay cowering down in front of Nick Belhor with Apollyon and Abbadon standing behind him*




Nick: *audio cutting in* ---and furthermore, Rex should be calling ahead and reserving a room in the hospital’s E.R. And the fact that this is a non-title match shows the hubris of NRWL’s executives and how they want their “marketable” champion figurehead. But I ask them, what will they do when their “poster boy” champion is nothing but a mess of irreparable flesh and meat lying in the middle of the canvas at the hands of Apollyon?




Jay: So it’s Apollyon taking on Rex? What’s in store for Abbadon then?




*Nick flares his eyes and scowls at Jay, who runs away*



Jay: Those guys scare me.



*cut to Jay standing with Ash in front of an NRWL logo backdrop*




Jay: Ash, you currently aren’t schedule for any match this Thursday. Anyone you would like to call out?




Ash: First off, let me say that you’ve got an awesome button-down shirt there. I also prefer the saturated colors as opposed to the pastels. And look at your rockin’ the matching tie!




Jay: Thanks! I got them at the Express!




Ash: Awesome! But yeah, the fans’ favorite, me, isn’t on the card right now. And that totally sucks! But there’s also 3 other dudes not on the card as well – Storm Harrison, Slugger Malone, and Marty Anderson. To all them I say, how about it? Let’s give these awesome fans a great match. Let’s steal the show! And if you are really asking “what’s in it for me?” then I say, “showcasing your talents in a match will get you a title shot quicker than doing nothing but watching other wrestle.” But I’m going to add a twist! How about some sort of “team” match. No one has one of those yet. Now, I would take anyone as a partner cause they’re all great! But I feel a certain kinship towards Storm Harrison. He’s got an awesome name, and he’s got long hair like me!




Jay: But—




Ash: So I’m ready to throw down and slap palms! Yeah! *walks off camera*



I thought “Slugger” was a pretty awesome name, and he has long hair too… Anyway, there you have it for the clips. Lastly, I have a message from Ingoyama……I think.




*reaches off-camera, pulls in object.*




See, I received this large piece of bark with weird markings and stick figures kind of painted on it. Using Google Translate, I interpreted it to roughly mean:




“Scotty the Body Eiffel Tower, when you stand off against me, you will lose. I will make you know the pride of my people. When the lion roars, your bones will quiver in panic under your flesh. You are now the trophy for which I hunt.”



And that’s it for this edition of the J-Transfer. Will the new challenges be accepted? Who will back up their words? Who will eat their words? What if Apollyon defeats Rex Anarchy? All these questions will be answered this Thursday! Don’t miss it!

The J-Transfer - Mysterious VHS Tape

March 12th 2011



Hi! This is Jay Phillips for another edition of The J-Transfer. I received this weird, square plastic thing in my mailbox this morning. It kind of looks like a big, bulky DVD case with two little wheels on it. One of the older gentlemen that works here said it was called a VHS tape. So I went to our A/V storage and found an old....what did he call it? A VCR? I popped it and hit "play" and here's what was on it...







*The video starts with the sound of microphone clipping along with the camera shaking erratically. It comes to rest pointed at Nick Belhor, with Apollyon and Abbadon standing over his left and right shoulders. The room is empty, and is barely lit by flickering, low-watt bulb in an old lamp with no lampshade*



Nick Belhor: Greetings. Now that this shameful joke of a championship tournament is concluded, perhaps my words will be listened to. They had better – for the sake of the signed talent in the NRWL.



This message’s target audience is none other than the newly anointed champion, Rex Anarchy. Rex, you are a fool playing a fool’s game. You talk about your notions of chaos. Take a look at yourself. You are not against the system. You are now part of the system. The NRWL now has their “poster boy” champion. The people love the charismatic villain. And make no mistake – the NRWL suits will make so much money off of you. Yes, you will line the pockets of type of men that you so claim to be against. Congratulations, you are now Rex Property.



And now, I invite you to take a look at the two men to my left and my right. These men are real men of chaos and turmoil. You may have defeated four men last night, but those four men combined aren’t even half of one of the Sons of Darkness. You know, Abbadon and Apollyon are also quite proficient in causing disorder and disruption to system – the systems of the human body.



So, paper champion, I humbly demand you, after having your shining moment in the sun to celebrate your hollow victory, earn your championship by taking on one of the Sons of Darkness. And I say “earn” and not “defend” because in our eyes, you haven’t proven you’re the best yet.



I implore you to choose and choose soon, or perhaps both Abbadon and Apollyon will have to change their names to “Wrecks Anarchy.”



*video cuts off*







Wow! Rex Anarchy isn't even champion for 12 hours and already he's being called out! Will he answer the call though? We'll see what we can get from Rex and we'll be checking his Twitter account regularly. I'm Jay Phillips and this was The J-Transfer!