*Slugger Malone's music plays through the arena. The crowd boos loudly but he ignores them completely and storms to the ring. He is dressed to fight. He picks up a microphone and motions with a throat cut to stop the music.*
Slugger Malone: Every single one of you fans need to shut the hell up.
*The crowd boos even louder and Slugger sneers at them and waits a moment before speaking again.*
SM: When I started in the NRWL, no one gave me a chance. Everyone thought I was just filler on the roster. They thought I was nothing more than a brawler with no brains. I proved all of them wrong. I made a name for myself. I succeeded in the ring. I even managed to outsmart my tag team partner and use him to elevate me even further. I know what I'm doing in this ring and I know how to make the most of every opportunity. I'm going to do the very same in season five.
*The crowd starts chanting "Slugger Sucks!" over and over again. Slugger clenches his teeth together.*
SM: That's another thing! It's time for a change. It's time for people to understand just how dangerous I am. From now on, you can refer to me as Killer Malone! That goes for you people out there in the crowd and for everyone backstage. If any of you pukes want to get in the ring with me, I'll be happy to put you down, spit on your corpse, and move onto the next one. Killer Malone is here to do some damage and ---
*Marty Anderson's music starts playing and the crowd erupts into the cheers. Marty comes out with a microphone in hand and stands at the top of the entrance ramp.*
Marty Anderson: Oh for God's sake, please stop talking.
*The crowd cheers even louder. Killer Malone screams at Marty Anderson from the ring.*
MA: Well, Slugger, sorry, Killer, I can appreciate you trying to make a big bang here right off the bat. I don't take anything away from you. You really are a talented wrestler and you are more crafty than maybe you get credit for. That aside, you want someone to step in the ring with? The way I see it, you and I are tied for victories against each other in the ring. I told the fans at the end of last season that I wanted to finish this for good. You and me, one on one, one last time. One man left standing. Yeah, that's right. A last man standing match. Marty Anderson vs. Killer Malone. We fight. One of us walks away from our feud the definitive victor.
KM: This will be your funeral, Anderson! Your defeat will be the proof. I am here to tear through the NRWL and no one will stop me.
MA: Can't wait to rain on your parade, Malone. See you in the ring!
*The crowd cheers as Marty tosses the microphone off the stage, waves to Killer Malone and walks back. Killer Malone stands in the ring and shakes his head, seething as he stares up at the top of the entrance ramp.*
Showing posts with label Slugger Malone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slugger Malone. Show all posts
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Building A Legacy
*Jay Phillips is in the ring with "Hardcore" Johnny Young. Johnny is wearing his black cargo pants and red shirt from the colors tournament that his team won. He looks around the arena as the fans give mixed reactions, though mostly negative.*
Jay Phillips: Johnny Young, last week your team went on to victory to give you a shot at the NRWL Championship currently held by Slam Jackson at the next event.
*The crowd erupts into cheers at the mention of Slam Jackson's name.*
JP: Johnny, what are your thoughts on how the tournament went down?
*Johnny Young looks around at the audience a little longer and nods his head a bit after some contemplation. He looks at Jay and takes the microphone from his hand in a casual manner.*
Johnny Young: You know, there's a lot to be said about that tournament but I'm going to break it down to simply this. I, Johnny Young, put together a team that I said would win that tournament and that's exactly what we did. Not only did we win but we won in a big way and it was me that turned the tides of that whole tournament! Now I'm going into the next event with a chance to once again hold NRWL gold.
*Jay cautiously gets up to the microphone in Johnny's hand.*
JP: Do you have anything you'd like to say to your fellow teammates from the Red Team?
JY: There is nothing to say to them. I assembled them because I wanted nothing more than to win that tournament. I knew they'd get the job done that's why I picked them! No, I have nothing to say to them. Once that tournament ended, it was time to get down to business and that business is taking down Slam Jackson.
*As Jay is about to get to the microphone to ask another question, Johnny turns around and starts to speak again, leaving Jay completely out of the conversation.*
JY: You see, I've been in the NRWL a long time. I was here in the beginning and I'm here now. I had early success, but you know what, it's not enough. It really isn't. You know, there's a lot of guys out there who used to wrestle for the NRWL that you could call legends. John Fraust, WarHead, Cujo, Hardcore Adam, The Druid, Dave Smith, Flawless Fred, and I could go on. So I've been thinking a lot about them lately. I've worked hard here in the NRWL. I made it my mission to do what no previous NRWL star could. I got myself into this fourth season. The great reboot of the company. I'm here and I intend to make that count. I am here to build a legacy. Whenever that day comes where I can't get in this ring and perform anymore, I want to make sure I'm remembered. Mark my words, I will go down as the greatest NRWL wrestler who ever competed. Period. I ---
*Marty Anderson's music hits and interrupts Johnny Young. Johnny puts the microphone down to his side and tightens his lips as he looks down the ramp. The crowd cheers as Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone walk down together. They get in the ring and Marty Anderson is handed a microphone.*
Marty Anderson: Sorry to break up the little victory speech you have going on here but we need to settle something first. Before you go off on your quest for the gold, we have a bit of an issue with the way you handled your team, specifically Slugger here. You could have put any two guys against each other you wanted in that second round match. Yet, out of all the guys you could have put against me, you pick my own teammate? My best friend? I don't know what you were trying to prove but we went out there and we battled it out. I'm proud to say that we gave it our all. Friends or not, we know what it means to get down to business. So what exactly was your game plan?
*Johnny looks at Slugger with a confused glance. Slugger takes the microphone from Marty.*
Slugger Malone: Johnny, it's not just Marty who wants answers. These fans want answers, too. And, well... I guess now's as good a time as any to give them.
*Suddenly, Slugger turns and clotheslines Marty Anderson. He gets down on his knees and starts punching Marty repeatedly in the face. Slugger pulls Marty up by the hair and then delivers a DDT. He grabs Marty's arm and lifts him enough to expose his chest and stomach and then motions to Johnny Young to take a shot. Johnny looks at both men and after a few moments shakes his head. He drops the microphone and walks out of the ring. Slugger shrugs and picks up Marty to his feet. He proceeds to give Marty "The Beating" and then picks up a microphone laying in the ring. The crowd is booing loudly as Marty Anderson lay motionless on the ring canvas.*
SM: You wanted answers, Marty. All of these fans do too. You want to know why we got put in that match together? Because I requested it! I went to Johnny Young and I begged him to put me in the ring against you. I did it because I'm tired of hearing over and over that you're the teacher and I'm the student. I'm tired of everyone looking at me like some tag along riding on your shoulders! I'm better than you, Marty, and I don't need you. Johnny just talked about how he wants to carve out a legacy for himself. Well that's just great. To do that, you need opportunities. As long as I'm around you, you're the one that would get those opportunities. I am just looked at as the guy who plays the part of your shadow. No more. It's time to set the record straight. So long, Marty.
*Slugger tosses the mic on Marty's motionless body and walks out of the ring.*
Jay Phillips: Johnny Young, last week your team went on to victory to give you a shot at the NRWL Championship currently held by Slam Jackson at the next event.
*The crowd erupts into cheers at the mention of Slam Jackson's name.*
JP: Johnny, what are your thoughts on how the tournament went down?
*Johnny Young looks around at the audience a little longer and nods his head a bit after some contemplation. He looks at Jay and takes the microphone from his hand in a casual manner.*
Johnny Young: You know, there's a lot to be said about that tournament but I'm going to break it down to simply this. I, Johnny Young, put together a team that I said would win that tournament and that's exactly what we did. Not only did we win but we won in a big way and it was me that turned the tides of that whole tournament! Now I'm going into the next event with a chance to once again hold NRWL gold.
*Jay cautiously gets up to the microphone in Johnny's hand.*
JP: Do you have anything you'd like to say to your fellow teammates from the Red Team?
JY: There is nothing to say to them. I assembled them because I wanted nothing more than to win that tournament. I knew they'd get the job done that's why I picked them! No, I have nothing to say to them. Once that tournament ended, it was time to get down to business and that business is taking down Slam Jackson.
*As Jay is about to get to the microphone to ask another question, Johnny turns around and starts to speak again, leaving Jay completely out of the conversation.*
JY: You see, I've been in the NRWL a long time. I was here in the beginning and I'm here now. I had early success, but you know what, it's not enough. It really isn't. You know, there's a lot of guys out there who used to wrestle for the NRWL that you could call legends. John Fraust, WarHead, Cujo, Hardcore Adam, The Druid, Dave Smith, Flawless Fred, and I could go on. So I've been thinking a lot about them lately. I've worked hard here in the NRWL. I made it my mission to do what no previous NRWL star could. I got myself into this fourth season. The great reboot of the company. I'm here and I intend to make that count. I am here to build a legacy. Whenever that day comes where I can't get in this ring and perform anymore, I want to make sure I'm remembered. Mark my words, I will go down as the greatest NRWL wrestler who ever competed. Period. I ---
*Marty Anderson's music hits and interrupts Johnny Young. Johnny puts the microphone down to his side and tightens his lips as he looks down the ramp. The crowd cheers as Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone walk down together. They get in the ring and Marty Anderson is handed a microphone.*
Marty Anderson: Sorry to break up the little victory speech you have going on here but we need to settle something first. Before you go off on your quest for the gold, we have a bit of an issue with the way you handled your team, specifically Slugger here. You could have put any two guys against each other you wanted in that second round match. Yet, out of all the guys you could have put against me, you pick my own teammate? My best friend? I don't know what you were trying to prove but we went out there and we battled it out. I'm proud to say that we gave it our all. Friends or not, we know what it means to get down to business. So what exactly was your game plan?
*Johnny looks at Slugger with a confused glance. Slugger takes the microphone from Marty.*
Slugger Malone: Johnny, it's not just Marty who wants answers. These fans want answers, too. And, well... I guess now's as good a time as any to give them.
*Suddenly, Slugger turns and clotheslines Marty Anderson. He gets down on his knees and starts punching Marty repeatedly in the face. Slugger pulls Marty up by the hair and then delivers a DDT. He grabs Marty's arm and lifts him enough to expose his chest and stomach and then motions to Johnny Young to take a shot. Johnny looks at both men and after a few moments shakes his head. He drops the microphone and walks out of the ring. Slugger shrugs and picks up Marty to his feet. He proceeds to give Marty "The Beating" and then picks up a microphone laying in the ring. The crowd is booing loudly as Marty Anderson lay motionless on the ring canvas.*
SM: You wanted answers, Marty. All of these fans do too. You want to know why we got put in that match together? Because I requested it! I went to Johnny Young and I begged him to put me in the ring against you. I did it because I'm tired of hearing over and over that you're the teacher and I'm the student. I'm tired of everyone looking at me like some tag along riding on your shoulders! I'm better than you, Marty, and I don't need you. Johnny just talked about how he wants to carve out a legacy for himself. Well that's just great. To do that, you need opportunities. As long as I'm around you, you're the one that would get those opportunities. I am just looked at as the guy who plays the part of your shadow. No more. It's time to set the record straight. So long, Marty.
*Slugger tosses the mic on Marty's motionless body and walks out of the ring.*
Sunday, July 31, 2011
The Jay Transfer: Breaking Matches!
Jay Phillips: Jay Phillips here with the J-Transfer! We’re a few hours away from the next event, and here’s the latest card additions! Meinrad von Brakkus will be taking on Apollyon. Here’s what Meinrad had to say:
Meinrad: NRWL management talked to me earlier this week, and it wasn’t the good kind of talk. So, to get them to change their tune, I’m calling out Apollyon. I can chop down that redwood, and show the NRWL that I still belong here!
Jay Phillips: Nick Belhor had this to say:
Nick Belhor: First off, let me address that gnat, Michael Armstrong. You somehow think that because you were gifted a match, and was also able to defeat a failure, that you are now some sort of headliner now? The only headline you’ll be known for is the shortest career in the NRWL, when Abbadon ends yours! And going back to that failure I mentioned, Meinrad. You are a waste. While NRWL management show us time and time again they are completely incompetent, they are correct in having suspicions about you. But then again, if they had any REAL managerial insight, you would have been gone already. They are a joke, and so are you.
Jay Phillips: Sounds like more hangs in the balance of that match that just a win/loss record! Up next, Doomsday takes on Johnny Young!
Doomsday: I’m still not officially on the roster, but I’m almost there. And I think taking down Johnny Young—which I WILL do—will be the last hurdle I have to clear to earn my roster spot. Johnny, you seem to take some sort of pride in being a kind of backstage bad-ass. I guess being out in the ring is proving too tough for you. But that’s OK, I’ll play by your rules. Let’s rumble somewhere else in the building—your choice. Just let me know where to be, and I’ll show up and deal you a beatdown!
Jay Phillips: Johnny Young, never one to not have a retort, responded with this:
Johnny Young: Awww yeaahh! The Star Player totally gets where you’re coming from. You’re upset because clearly nobody ever showed you any attention in life. Whereas me, I can’t stop getting attention from everyone! Unfortunately for you though, you’ve got my attention. And if a Grade-A beatdown is what you’re asking for, I’ll be happy to provide it. See you in the ring! Don’t forget your glow sticks, freak! Yeeaaahhh!!!
Jay Phillips: Has relative new kid on the block Doomsday bitten off more than he can chew in Johnny Young, who excels in backstage brawls? This will be an exciting one to watch! Up next, Pedro Muchaco calls out Slugger Malone.
Pedro: *pedro is relaxing in his Jacuzzi (still still wearing his mask) with a hot little Latina at each arm* Ay! Sloogur Mah-lohwn! I saw chu get set on fire last show. Ha ha ha! Bet that deedn’t feel good, deed it hombre? I got somtheeng else hot for chu, man. And no, I don’t meen one of theese chicas. I meen me! Theenk chu can take the heet? I don’t theenk so! So get out of the keecheen!
Jay: Slugger, never backing down from a challenge, rebutted with this.
Slugger: Listen here, runt! You may be quick and always flying, but you know what else does that too? These! *holds up his dukes* Too bad for you though, these do more damage, too. I’m gonna make that mask of your be permanently imbedded into your face! Bring it!
Jay: Something is telling me for some strange reason that that match is going to be the sleeper match of the night. And finally, Marty Anderson reported to find this chunk of bark outside his dressing room door. He sent us this pic.
*piece of bark shows two stick figures. One with an orange beard, and one with blue shorts. The stick figure with the blue shorts has an X scratched into the bark over it.*
Jay: Marty, like the rest of us, take this as a challenge from Ingoyama. Marty had this to say:
Marty: This nutjob pulls out a lucky win over Slugger, and thinks he’s ready to take me on? If it was a *real* match, Slugger would’ve won easily. In fact, he already did that. Any chump can toss someone over ropes. But pining shoulders to the mat requires skill, quick thinking, and killer instinct. Ingoyama, you messed up bad challenging me. So I’m going to make you learn from your mistake the hard way! Whether you love me, or you hate me, I’ll make sure you respect me. And you will.
Jay Phillips: There you have it. Once again, it promises to be a heck of a show! Don’t miss it!
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Macho Madness!
May 21st 2011
*Slam Jackson and Storm Harrison are backstage talking to each other. Jay Phillips walks over to them to get an interview.*
Jay Phillips: Well, what a sight to see! Slam Jackson AND Storm Harrison together. This is the perfect opportunity to discuss the upcoming event with the both of you.
Slam Jackson: J-Dawg, it’s a sad day in the wrestling world. Storm and I were just talking about the death of one of our heroes, “The Macho Man” Randy Savage. If it wasn’t for him, we might not even be here in the NRWL doing what we love. Macho Man, the Slamnation mourns for you. Rest in peace, brother.
Storm Harrison: That’s right. Randy Savage was everything you wanted in a wrestler. He was definitely one of the best.
JP: Yes, truly a huge loss for wrestling. The NRWL mourns the loss of this great icon.
*All three men stand there silently, taking in the gravity of the moment. Finally, Slam Jackson breaks the silence.*
SJ: But Jay! There is trouble and the Slamnation must deal with it! That shiny, spiky haired, meathead Scotty Paris called me a weirdo! I won’t stand for this and neither will the Slamnation! Isn’t that right? Let me hear you!!!
*People start cheering wildly. Jay and Storm look around with confused looks, for they are the only people around Slam that they can see.*
SJ: I promise you this! Scotty Paris better have insurance on that cell phone he’s always talking on because it’s about to be inserted into his backside! It’s time someone teaches him a lesson in manners and I’m the man to ---
*Suddenly, Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone come by and interrupt the scene. Marty immediately grabs the microphone from Jay Phillips, cutting off Slam*
Marty Anderson: Before Slam got all excited here, I couldn’t help but overhear you two talking about Randy Savage. Slugger and I were fans too. Now, Slam and Slugger, you guys have matches already this week but Storm, you’re free. Why don’t you and I get in the ring at the upcoming event in tribute to the Macho Man? We’re no strangers in the ring but I think we can turn it up a notch and make the man proud. What do you say? You in?
*Storm starts nodding his head.*
SH: For the Macho Man. Let’s do this.
MA: Great. Alright, let’s go Slugger. We’ve got to clean up your dressing room. What a mess.
Slugger Malone: I don’t know what kind of paint he used but damn, I’ve been scrubbing it for days. I’m telling you, it’s not coming off.
*The two men discuss further as they walk off. Slam looks at Jay and Storm and then immediately starts talking again as if he was never interrupted.*
SJ: --- do it! I’m sending him back to Miami, Los Angeles, San Diego, or wherever he’s from so he can go cry in his mother’s lap. Where is he from anyway?
*Jay is about to answer but Slam immediately starts talking again*
SJ: I don’t remember either. It doesn’t matter. I’ll take him from coast-to-coast in a Slamnationwide tour!
JP: It sounds like Slam Jackson and his Slamnation are pumped up for his upcoming match with Scotty Paris. Storm Harrison will meet Marty Anderson in the ring now as well. This is building up to be a great show!
*Slam Jackson kneels down and hits play on an old ghetto blaster boom box. “Pomp and Circumstance”, Macho Man Randy Savage’s theme song, starts playing. Slam Jackson points one finger in the air and puts his other hand on his hip, twirls around until he is off camera. Storm Harrison and Jay Phillips shrug at each other and then do the same.*
*Slam Jackson and Storm Harrison are backstage talking to each other. Jay Phillips walks over to them to get an interview.*
Jay Phillips: Well, what a sight to see! Slam Jackson AND Storm Harrison together. This is the perfect opportunity to discuss the upcoming event with the both of you.
Slam Jackson: J-Dawg, it’s a sad day in the wrestling world. Storm and I were just talking about the death of one of our heroes, “The Macho Man” Randy Savage. If it wasn’t for him, we might not even be here in the NRWL doing what we love. Macho Man, the Slamnation mourns for you. Rest in peace, brother.
Storm Harrison: That’s right. Randy Savage was everything you wanted in a wrestler. He was definitely one of the best.
JP: Yes, truly a huge loss for wrestling. The NRWL mourns the loss of this great icon.
*All three men stand there silently, taking in the gravity of the moment. Finally, Slam Jackson breaks the silence.*
SJ: But Jay! There is trouble and the Slamnation must deal with it! That shiny, spiky haired, meathead Scotty Paris called me a weirdo! I won’t stand for this and neither will the Slamnation! Isn’t that right? Let me hear you!!!
*People start cheering wildly. Jay and Storm look around with confused looks, for they are the only people around Slam that they can see.*
SJ: I promise you this! Scotty Paris better have insurance on that cell phone he’s always talking on because it’s about to be inserted into his backside! It’s time someone teaches him a lesson in manners and I’m the man to ---
*Suddenly, Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone come by and interrupt the scene. Marty immediately grabs the microphone from Jay Phillips, cutting off Slam*
Marty Anderson: Before Slam got all excited here, I couldn’t help but overhear you two talking about Randy Savage. Slugger and I were fans too. Now, Slam and Slugger, you guys have matches already this week but Storm, you’re free. Why don’t you and I get in the ring at the upcoming event in tribute to the Macho Man? We’re no strangers in the ring but I think we can turn it up a notch and make the man proud. What do you say? You in?
*Storm starts nodding his head.*
SH: For the Macho Man. Let’s do this.
MA: Great. Alright, let’s go Slugger. We’ve got to clean up your dressing room. What a mess.
Slugger Malone: I don’t know what kind of paint he used but damn, I’ve been scrubbing it for days. I’m telling you, it’s not coming off.
*The two men discuss further as they walk off. Slam looks at Jay and Storm and then immediately starts talking again as if he was never interrupted.*
SJ: --- do it! I’m sending him back to Miami, Los Angeles, San Diego, or wherever he’s from so he can go cry in his mother’s lap. Where is he from anyway?
*Jay is about to answer but Slam immediately starts talking again*
SJ: I don’t remember either. It doesn’t matter. I’ll take him from coast-to-coast in a Slamnationwide tour!
JP: It sounds like Slam Jackson and his Slamnation are pumped up for his upcoming match with Scotty Paris. Storm Harrison will meet Marty Anderson in the ring now as well. This is building up to be a great show!
*Slam Jackson kneels down and hits play on an old ghetto blaster boom box. “Pomp and Circumstance”, Macho Man Randy Savage’s theme song, starts playing. Slam Jackson points one finger in the air and puts his other hand on his hip, twirls around until he is off camera. Storm Harrison and Jay Phillips shrug at each other and then do the same.*
Monday, May 16, 2011
The J-Transfer - The Past Week's Goings Ons
May 16th 2011
Welcome to another edition of the J-Transfer! I’m Jay Phillips! Well, the Playstation Network is FINALLY back up so I can not post these videos and interv----what? What do you mean it didn’t effect the regular internet?? Oh man! I didn’t know the Internet still worked without the Playstation Network! I’ve just been playing Solitaire all this time on my computer! Man!
Anyway! Here’s some vids from last week just after the matches took place!
*clip cuts to Jay running up to Nick Belhor walking down the hallway and looking less than pleased*
Jay: Nick! Can you comment on the matches your guys were in?
Nick: Mr. Phillips, if I have to see you again this week, you’ll be paid a visit by the Sons of Darkness.
Jay: *worried* I’m sorry Mr. Belhor. Just your thoughts and I’ll go?
Nick: My thoughts are this. The NRWL, it’s executives, and it’s officiating have shown their true colors tonight. Once, yet again, they have pushed a member of the Sons of Darkness down!
Jay: What do you mean?
Nick: I’m talking about inappropriate disqualification of Abbadon!
Jay: But---you---elbowed Storm….?
Nick: I DID NO SUCH THING!!!! Storm Harrison left the ring to come at me—
Jay: I thought Abbadon threw him out?
Nick: --and I was trying to assist him back in, and my foot got caught on a badly set piece of padding and I tripped and landed on him. I tried to stop myself but couldn’t! And the ref stops the match. This federation is a joke.
Jay: So….what’s next for the Sons of Darkness?
Nick: What’s next is this. I will have them in a match where they are the most dangerous – together! We have certain unfinished business with one Rex Anarchy. Just because that miserable bedbug Scotty Paris cost Apollyon the belt, doesn’t mean Rex is safe. And while we’re at it, we might as well kill two birds with stone. Bruno Kowalski is making waves and turning heads. I’m sure he will be granted a title shot before either of the more deserving Sons of Darkness. So we will put him out of commission too.
Jay: So you’re proposing the Sons of Darkness vs. Rex Anarchy and Bruno Kowalski?
Nick: I’m not proposing it. I’m demanding it. Not get away from me, Jay!
*clips ends. Next one starts in Scotty “The Body” Paris’s private, gigantic locker room, right after his match with Apollyon. He’s bruised and his hair is disheveled. He is getting a rub down from a very attractive could-be-swimsuit-model masseuse. On a separate table, Trixie is getting her own massage from a guy who could pass as an Abercrombie & Fitch model. Scotty is yelling into his phone*
Scotty: --What are you talking about?? That match was great!!! …………Yeah, ok. I suppose I “technically” lost, but you know what? Nobody gave me a snowball’s chance in a microwave, and I went out there and gave that brainless musclehead a fight he won’t forget! Everyone is amazed by me! I came out of that smelling like roses! I’m amazing! I just keep getting better and better! Winner of the incredible ladder match! Got a title shot in this here briefcase *reaches down and pats the briefcase under the massage table* and now I’m known as the man who beat the Incredible Hulk, Apollyon, within an inch of his life! ……………..Right. Well, I’m just going to keep going up and make a splash at the next show by beating down another visible character. And I mean visible because his clothes are louder than a rock concert. I’m going to take on that weirdo Slam Jackson ………………Yeah, I know he’s deranged, but he CAN’T be worse than Apollyon! So he can go out there, clap his hands, pump his fists, rile up his Sham-nation, and then, I’ll beat them and laugh in their faces as watch their hero fall. I tell you, things are looking good for Scotty “The Body”, because I make it that way!
*clip cuts to Meinrad standing in the backstage interview area with Jay*
Meinrad: Let me tell you this, Jay. I’m pretty angry about last week. I wasn’t included on the card. And then, I lose in an exhibition match to a nobody! Well, I want this Armstrong guy in the ring again. One on one! I want to see what this kid has! And he’d better have something, because I’m bring the hammer of Brakkus down on him! I want to show him what it takes in the NRWL from the start! I want him in a TLC match. Let’s see what time of man he is!
*Clips cuts to in the ring action. Ash and Pedro Muchacho are in each other’s face with Jay Phillips in between them holding a mic*
Pedro: --Come on, hombre. Leyts see what chu got!
Ash: Oh I got plenty! I got a car! And a 3 bedroom apartment! And LED TV! And a—
Pedro: I meen een the reeng! *slaps head* Hay-soos Cristo!
Ash: Listen, Muchacho! You might be on quite the roll, but so am I! You beat some tough opponents, but I’ve beaten tougher ones. You might have talent, but I have more talent. But the one thing you don’t have, is the support of all these great fans!
*crowd cheers. Ash takes a few steps back and raises his arms out to the side and opens and closes his hands, asking for more noise. The crowd obliges. Pedro covers his ears and shakes his head and waves his arms at the crowd trying to get them to quiet down. They cheer louder. He finally gives up and yells into the microphone*
Pedro: Ok, hombre! Eets chu and me!
Ash: What’s chewing you?
Pedro: No! CHU! *points at Ash* ….. AND! …..ME! *points at himself*
Ash: Oh. Well you got it! Get ready to celebrate Cinco de My-Oh-My-Pedro-Sucks!
*Crows cheers with approval. Pedro stomps angrily in the ring at the insult.*
*Clip cuts to Slugger Malone walking up to his dressing room. He reaches for the doorknob but notices the door is ajar. Cautiously, he pushes it open. The door swings open and Slugger’s brow furls and his mouth turns into an angry frown. Painted all over his dressing room’s walls are stick figures of animals, people and other crude objects.*
Slugger: Son of a…. It’d better not be that freak in the loincloth…
*Slugger looks to his dressing room table and sees the tell-tale piece of bark*
Slugger: Ok. He’s asking for The Beating of his life. And I won’t disappoint him!
*clips end*
Once again, so much going on! The action never stops in the NRWL! This was the J-Transfer! See you next time!
Welcome to another edition of the J-Transfer! I’m Jay Phillips! Well, the Playstation Network is FINALLY back up so I can not post these videos and interv----what? What do you mean it didn’t effect the regular internet?? Oh man! I didn’t know the Internet still worked without the Playstation Network! I’ve just been playing Solitaire all this time on my computer! Man!
Anyway! Here’s some vids from last week just after the matches took place!
*clip cuts to Jay running up to Nick Belhor walking down the hallway and looking less than pleased*
Jay: Nick! Can you comment on the matches your guys were in?
Nick: Mr. Phillips, if I have to see you again this week, you’ll be paid a visit by the Sons of Darkness.
Jay: *worried* I’m sorry Mr. Belhor. Just your thoughts and I’ll go?
Nick: My thoughts are this. The NRWL, it’s executives, and it’s officiating have shown their true colors tonight. Once, yet again, they have pushed a member of the Sons of Darkness down!
Jay: What do you mean?
Nick: I’m talking about inappropriate disqualification of Abbadon!
Jay: But---you---elbowed Storm….?
Nick: I DID NO SUCH THING!!!! Storm Harrison left the ring to come at me—
Jay: I thought Abbadon threw him out?
Nick: --and I was trying to assist him back in, and my foot got caught on a badly set piece of padding and I tripped and landed on him. I tried to stop myself but couldn’t! And the ref stops the match. This federation is a joke.
Jay: So….what’s next for the Sons of Darkness?
Nick: What’s next is this. I will have them in a match where they are the most dangerous – together! We have certain unfinished business with one Rex Anarchy. Just because that miserable bedbug Scotty Paris cost Apollyon the belt, doesn’t mean Rex is safe. And while we’re at it, we might as well kill two birds with stone. Bruno Kowalski is making waves and turning heads. I’m sure he will be granted a title shot before either of the more deserving Sons of Darkness. So we will put him out of commission too.
Jay: So you’re proposing the Sons of Darkness vs. Rex Anarchy and Bruno Kowalski?
Nick: I’m not proposing it. I’m demanding it. Not get away from me, Jay!
*clips ends. Next one starts in Scotty “The Body” Paris’s private, gigantic locker room, right after his match with Apollyon. He’s bruised and his hair is disheveled. He is getting a rub down from a very attractive could-be-swimsuit-model masseuse. On a separate table, Trixie is getting her own massage from a guy who could pass as an Abercrombie & Fitch model. Scotty is yelling into his phone*
Scotty: --What are you talking about?? That match was great!!! …………Yeah, ok. I suppose I “technically” lost, but you know what? Nobody gave me a snowball’s chance in a microwave, and I went out there and gave that brainless musclehead a fight he won’t forget! Everyone is amazed by me! I came out of that smelling like roses! I’m amazing! I just keep getting better and better! Winner of the incredible ladder match! Got a title shot in this here briefcase *reaches down and pats the briefcase under the massage table* and now I’m known as the man who beat the Incredible Hulk, Apollyon, within an inch of his life! ……………..Right. Well, I’m just going to keep going up and make a splash at the next show by beating down another visible character. And I mean visible because his clothes are louder than a rock concert. I’m going to take on that weirdo Slam Jackson ………………Yeah, I know he’s deranged, but he CAN’T be worse than Apollyon! So he can go out there, clap his hands, pump his fists, rile up his Sham-nation, and then, I’ll beat them and laugh in their faces as watch their hero fall. I tell you, things are looking good for Scotty “The Body”, because I make it that way!
*clip cuts to Meinrad standing in the backstage interview area with Jay*
Meinrad: Let me tell you this, Jay. I’m pretty angry about last week. I wasn’t included on the card. And then, I lose in an exhibition match to a nobody! Well, I want this Armstrong guy in the ring again. One on one! I want to see what this kid has! And he’d better have something, because I’m bring the hammer of Brakkus down on him! I want to show him what it takes in the NRWL from the start! I want him in a TLC match. Let’s see what time of man he is!
*Clips cuts to in the ring action. Ash and Pedro Muchacho are in each other’s face with Jay Phillips in between them holding a mic*
Pedro: --Come on, hombre. Leyts see what chu got!
Ash: Oh I got plenty! I got a car! And a 3 bedroom apartment! And LED TV! And a—
Pedro: I meen een the reeng! *slaps head* Hay-soos Cristo!
Ash: Listen, Muchacho! You might be on quite the roll, but so am I! You beat some tough opponents, but I’ve beaten tougher ones. You might have talent, but I have more talent. But the one thing you don’t have, is the support of all these great fans!
*crowd cheers. Ash takes a few steps back and raises his arms out to the side and opens and closes his hands, asking for more noise. The crowd obliges. Pedro covers his ears and shakes his head and waves his arms at the crowd trying to get them to quiet down. They cheer louder. He finally gives up and yells into the microphone*
Pedro: Ok, hombre! Eets chu and me!
Ash: What’s chewing you?
Pedro: No! CHU! *points at Ash* ….. AND! …..ME! *points at himself*
Ash: Oh. Well you got it! Get ready to celebrate Cinco de My-Oh-My-Pedro-Sucks!
*Crows cheers with approval. Pedro stomps angrily in the ring at the insult.*
*Clip cuts to Slugger Malone walking up to his dressing room. He reaches for the doorknob but notices the door is ajar. Cautiously, he pushes it open. The door swings open and Slugger’s brow furls and his mouth turns into an angry frown. Painted all over his dressing room’s walls are stick figures of animals, people and other crude objects.*
Slugger: Son of a…. It’d better not be that freak in the loincloth…
*Slugger looks to his dressing room table and sees the tell-tale piece of bark*
Slugger: Ok. He’s asking for The Beating of his life. And I won’t disappoint him!
*clips end*
Once again, so much going on! The action never stops in the NRWL! This was the J-Transfer! See you next time!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
A Real Headscratcher
May 5th 2011
Jay Phillips: Hello fans! Welcome to the NRWL Arena Interview Stage. Thanks for all of you in attendance today. We have a great interview lined up for you today. After Ash and Slam Jackson issued a challenge to Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone, I felt we needed to get a response from them. So, let’s bring them out.
*Marty Anderson’s music starts playing and he comes out with Slugger Malone to the Interview Stage. The fans give a mixed response, mostly jeers. Both wrestlers don’t seem to be paying attention to them.*
JP: Marty Anderson, Slugger Malone, thank you for coming today.
Marty Anderson: With pleasure, Jay. We’re going to cut right to the chase. We went into singles competition last week but first and foremost, we are a team. This time around, we want a tag match.
JP: Well, surely you know that you were challenged this week by Ash and his partner, Slam Jackson.
Slugger Malone: The hell are you talking about?
MA: Yeah, this is the first we’re hearing of this.
JP: Ok, wait. So you are saying that you haven’t seen the challenge?
SM: No, we haven’t! That’s exactly what we’re telling you, Jay.
JP: Well, I think you’ll need to see this. Please play the Ash and Slam clip from yesterday.
*On the screen behind Jay, Anderson, and Malone, the challenge that was issued to them begins to play. Anderson and Malone watch intently at the beginning. Suddenly, as Slam Jackson falls through the wall and stumbles to collect his fedora, both men start looking at the screen with a stunning and confused look. They begin to look at each other in confusion as the clip continues on. Malone begins scratching his head. Anderson starts whispering something into Malone’s ear, whose only response is to shake his head. Finally, when the clip ends, both men turn to Jay with a blank stare.*
JP: There you have it. You’ve been challenged by Ash and the Slamnation.
*The audience begins to cheer.*
MA: Oooh Kaayyy... So. Well. Well geez, Jay, what is that supposed to be? Some sort of joke? If these clowns want a match, then we’ll give them a match.
SM: The... Slam.. Nation?
MA: I don’t know, they’re idiots. If Ash and Slam Jackson think they have a chance to--
*The fans begin to cheer at the mention of Ash and Slam.*
MA: Oh you can’t be serious. Do you people really think these two clowns are worth your time?
*The fans cheer even louder.*
MA: You know, there are some real, true wrestling fans who judge a competitor by their talent in the ring, not their goofy antics outside of it. I don’t care what you people think of Ash and Slam Jackson. The truth is, they may make good comedians but they can’t hold a candle to Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone.
SM: You’re abso- *The fans are chanting ‘Ash and Slam! Ash and Slam!’* - Hey! Shut up! I’m talking here!
*The crown continues their chant. Slugger Malone sneers and draws his lips into a thin line. Finally, he continues to speak over the chants.*
SM: It’s going to be a real pleasure to watch all you fans with tears in your eyes when we beat your jokester heroes in the ring. Ash and Slam have no chance against us. Ash already lost to us once before. Slam is no threat to us. We’ll make sure to silence the Slamnation and then finish the job that Abbadon started on Ash.
MA: Slugger’s right. We’re coming in there to shut this little party down and make sure people know what real wrestlers look like. Whether you like us or hate us, you’ll respect us when you see what we do to these two clowns. Let’s get out of here, Slugger.
*Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone leave the Interview Stage. The fans are still chanting ‘Ash and Slam! Ash and Slam!’ as Jay stands alone.*
JP: Well, I guess that settles it. We’re going to have quite a tag team match when Ash and Slam Jackson take on Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone!
Jay Phillips: Hello fans! Welcome to the NRWL Arena Interview Stage. Thanks for all of you in attendance today. We have a great interview lined up for you today. After Ash and Slam Jackson issued a challenge to Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone, I felt we needed to get a response from them. So, let’s bring them out.
*Marty Anderson’s music starts playing and he comes out with Slugger Malone to the Interview Stage. The fans give a mixed response, mostly jeers. Both wrestlers don’t seem to be paying attention to them.*
JP: Marty Anderson, Slugger Malone, thank you for coming today.
Marty Anderson: With pleasure, Jay. We’re going to cut right to the chase. We went into singles competition last week but first and foremost, we are a team. This time around, we want a tag match.
JP: Well, surely you know that you were challenged this week by Ash and his partner, Slam Jackson.
Slugger Malone: The hell are you talking about?
MA: Yeah, this is the first we’re hearing of this.
JP: Ok, wait. So you are saying that you haven’t seen the challenge?
SM: No, we haven’t! That’s exactly what we’re telling you, Jay.
JP: Well, I think you’ll need to see this. Please play the Ash and Slam clip from yesterday.
*On the screen behind Jay, Anderson, and Malone, the challenge that was issued to them begins to play. Anderson and Malone watch intently at the beginning. Suddenly, as Slam Jackson falls through the wall and stumbles to collect his fedora, both men start looking at the screen with a stunning and confused look. They begin to look at each other in confusion as the clip continues on. Malone begins scratching his head. Anderson starts whispering something into Malone’s ear, whose only response is to shake his head. Finally, when the clip ends, both men turn to Jay with a blank stare.*
JP: There you have it. You’ve been challenged by Ash and the Slamnation.
*The audience begins to cheer.*
MA: Oooh Kaayyy... So. Well. Well geez, Jay, what is that supposed to be? Some sort of joke? If these clowns want a match, then we’ll give them a match.
SM: The... Slam.. Nation?
MA: I don’t know, they’re idiots. If Ash and Slam Jackson think they have a chance to--
*The fans begin to cheer at the mention of Ash and Slam.*
MA: Oh you can’t be serious. Do you people really think these two clowns are worth your time?
*The fans cheer even louder.*
MA: You know, there are some real, true wrestling fans who judge a competitor by their talent in the ring, not their goofy antics outside of it. I don’t care what you people think of Ash and Slam Jackson. The truth is, they may make good comedians but they can’t hold a candle to Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone.
SM: You’re abso- *The fans are chanting ‘Ash and Slam! Ash and Slam!’* - Hey! Shut up! I’m talking here!
*The crown continues their chant. Slugger Malone sneers and draws his lips into a thin line. Finally, he continues to speak over the chants.*
SM: It’s going to be a real pleasure to watch all you fans with tears in your eyes when we beat your jokester heroes in the ring. Ash and Slam have no chance against us. Ash already lost to us once before. Slam is no threat to us. We’ll make sure to silence the Slamnation and then finish the job that Abbadon started on Ash.
MA: Slugger’s right. We’re coming in there to shut this little party down and make sure people know what real wrestlers look like. Whether you like us or hate us, you’ll respect us when you see what we do to these two clowns. Let’s get out of here, Slugger.
*Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone leave the Interview Stage. The fans are still chanting ‘Ash and Slam! Ash and Slam!’ as Jay stands alone.*
JP: Well, I guess that settles it. We’re going to have quite a tag team match when Ash and Slam Jackson take on Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone!
Friday, April 22, 2011
The J-Transfer - Putting Them in Their Place
April 22nd 2011
Jay Phillips here with another edition of the J-Transfer. Last time, we learned by Bruno Kowalski challenged Marty Anderson to a match to test his abilities in the singles match. I went to get Marty’s response. He was with Slugger Malone outside of a ring at the NRWL training facility. Here was what they had to say.
Marty Anderson: Bruno Kowalski? You know, he’s got the look and the determination of a champion. I’ll give him that. Unfortunately, he’s not very smart. He went in front of a crowd and challenged me to a match with this smug look on his face like some punk kid. Well I’ll tell you what, Kowalski. When we get into that ring, the first thing I’m going to do is slap that smugness right off your face and show you how to not only talk the talk, but the walk the walk as well.
Slugger Malone: Bruno, I don’t know what you think you’ve gotten yourself into here but it’s a mess, I can guarantee you that. You’ll be backstage nursing your wounds and wondering why you ever did such a stupid thing calling out Marty Anderson like you did. He won’t just beat you in the ring, he’ll make sure you feel it for weeks to come.
MA: You better believe it. Slugger speaks the truth. You’ll be lucky to leave without a few broken ribs or a broken arm. You’ll be getting a real lesson in humility, I guarantee you. Whether you love me, or you hate me, you’ll respect me, and you’ll never forget me. See you in the ring, punk.
And some strong words from Marty Anderson and his partner, Slugger Malone. I don’t know about you guys but I’m really looking forward to seeing what happens in this match!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Here to Stay
April 5th 2011
An NRWL cameraman was on his way back from the interview stage following an altercation between Mark Blood and Johnny Young when he was stopped by Marty Anderson and Slugger Malone. They had a statement of their own to make. Marty had something to say about their tag match against Ash and Storm Harrison.
“You know, they say that I hogged the match and Slugger just finished up but that’s as false as it comes. What really happened was that we planned this from the start. Yeah. While Ash and Harrison probably said ‘How do you do’ moments before coming out to the ring to face us, Slugger and I spoke to each other well in advanced and formulated a strategy. That’s how teamwork is accomplished. The intention was always for me to start working them on the mat and Slugger to come in and lay down the heavy hits. What we DIDN’T expect was for our opponents to fall so quickly! Ash and Storm Harrison are fine wrestlers but obviously they are no team. Slugger Malone and I started talking after the match and we realized that we had a lot in common. We aren’t content with pinning your shoulders to the mat. We want you to remember us and remember us you will. When you are nursing your cuts, bruises, and broken bones, you’ll be sure to say, ‘Anderson and Malone did this to me.’ We are here to make a statement and together, oh, rest assured, a statement will be made. Isn’t that right, Slugger?”
“That’s right, Marty. We’re here to cause some damage. In fact, I’m starting right now with Storm Harrison. Harrison, you want a rematch, one-on-one, you’ve got it, my friend. You felt it before. You walked out of that ring with a busted head. It was something you’ll never forget. I don’t know why you want a repeat performance but you are certain to get it.”
Marty Anderson smiled and slapped Slugger Malone on the back with a laugh. He had one more statement to make.
“Well, we won’t be in tag action but I’m not going to sit around. There’s a guy in the NRWL that everyone is talking about. They say he’s got some real mat skills. Bruno Kowalski, you’ve looked pretty good so far but it’s time for you to prove it. Step in the ring with me and let’s see what you’ve got. You’re looking at someone who is at home in the ring, like yourself. I train everyday, just like you. You even showed you have a mean streak in you after last week’s Triple Threat match. Well, aside from me, there’s no one else in the NRWL that matches you so completely. Let’s do this. Whether you love me, or you hate me, I’ll make sure you respect me. Come on, Malone. Let’s go.”
Both men walked away. It appears the NRWL has a new tag team, a challenge has been answered, and another has been issued.
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